Look familiar?
So what's the deal? How can that photo make me both happy and sad? Well, I'll tell you. The truth is, that picture is the epitome of the perfect family picture to me. Perfect because I'm not in it. No, I'm not saying that I want out of my family or that they would be better without me or anything like that. I just feel like I would mess up the picture by being in it.
That sounds worse out here than it does in my head. Let me try to explain.
I have (and have always had) terrible body image. I have always felt too big (even when I wasn't--you'll be seeing that in a post soon enough) and now that I actually am too big I am hideously self conscious. I feel so strongly about this picture that I used it in an online project put together by Jack Sh*t of Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit. (He's hysterical, by the way. Go over there and read some of his stuff. AFTER you finish up here, of course!)
I hate to be in pictures because I feel like I ruin them. Many a great picture of my children will never see the light of day because I am in the shot too. I've recently started working on my weight and one of the reasons is that I want to take real family pictures. The kind that I am in too. The kids and Jason deserve that. And so do I.
Do you have hang-ups about being in pictures or do you know someone who does? Have you ever struggled with body image issues?
I've struggled with my weight for about the past 10 years. I actually would never allow myself to be in pictures either. That's why most of the pictures that have me in them are from military balls. LOL! I did focus on my weight and lose about 60 pounds this last year and I feel better but I'm still never in pictures. It got so bad that The Hubble doesn't even think to take pix of me because I never let him before. The one thing though, is that when your kids are older and want to look at their past, you are an integral part of that past and if you aren't in the pix it's cheating them. They love you just the way you are and they will want to remember you as that loving, beautiful, amazing woman that they already think you are. Size doesn't matter. It's what's inside that counts. And I happen to think you are pretty awesome too! Now get in front of the camera woman! ;-)
ReplyDeleteYou rock! Sixty pounds is an amazing loss! Congratulations.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the encouragement. I'm doing pretty well but it's a struggle at times. Support helps. :)
Oh Gah! I don't know a woman out there that Actually LOVES photos taken of themselves. Me included. It is handy that I am the one always taking pictures, but I do recognize the need to have them because I don't have very many of MY mother when we were younger. So what happens is me taking self portraits... and those are even WORSE!
ReplyDeleteI just for the most part keep them to myself and for my kids when they get older :)